In this video, I show my physique, which is silly and narcissistic.1 However, due to cancer, my ability to work out or eat properly will be inhibited for as long as a year. If there was ever a time to be silly and narcissistic, it is now, just before my surgery to remove my testicle.2
If it feels too boring to watch a seven minute video of me prancing shirtless around the room, feel free to scroll through these 16 pictures.
Some NOTES
Through a combination of camera angles, lighting, and flexing, I can look a lot stronger and more impressive than I actually am. My current bodyfat percentage is not very low, and my muscles are not very large.3
I have slight gynecomastia. This is not due to steroid use, but because I am naturally effeminate with a lot of estrogen.
My diet consists of dried ginger, kefir, chicken, coconut cookies, acai juice, and gogo squeezy fruit packets.
I started applying coconut oil this summer after showering to reduce the pain associated with sunburn, and introduce vitamin E. It just so happens to accentuate my muscles as well.
I do not shave any hair on my chest or back. I am just not hairy. This is probably because I have insensitive androgen receptors.
I have chicken legs. I would love to train my legs, but my knee and sacrum are dislocated, which means I can only do low-intensity cardio (walking).
Here is how I could improve my physique:
Cure my cancer, so I can stop being stressed about it.
Be more confrontational, but engage in less long-winded arguments. This would eliminate annoying (stressful) people from my life, and reduce the amount of time I waste on bickering, lowering cortisol.
Eliminate the internet from my bedroom to reduce insomnia. Currently, I sleep about 5 days a week, as opposed to the normal 7 nights a week. This is the single greatest thing lowering my testosterone, in addition to the stress of having cancer.
Have more and better sex. I haven’t had good / enjoyable sex with someone I love in over two years. Since then, all my sexual encounters have been dissatisfying. Regular, high quality sex increases testosterone. The best way to achieve this without expending excessive time on dating apps / PUA is to enter a monogamous relationship.4
Force-feed myself two pounds of meat per day.
Magically heal my joints,5 maybe using BPC-157, so I can do normal strength training, and so I can replace low intensity cardio with high intensity cardio.
Steroids.
Creatine, zinc, magnesium, glycine, and other assorted supplements. I currently don’t take any of these — sometimes I remember to take collagen and turmeric once a week, but that’s it.
The POINT of This POST
People tell me to stop worrying about things. This is like telling a depressed person to “stop being depressed.” It is neither effective, nor helpful.
However, I can say conclusively that exercise helps me to worry less. I can only work out so much, because I have systemic and debilitating injuries. But I try my best.
I am a Platonist, so I reject mind-body dualism. The mind and body act upon each other in a feedback loop. Those who neglect the training of their body, thinking that it is “irrelevant” are ignorant, pompous, arrogant, and presumptuous.
All people should maximize their physical training. This requires, at minimum, two hours of training per week.6
There are different forms of neuroticism, which I will refer to as “long-form” and “short-form.” Long neuroticism appears as idealism, which is an obsession with art, heroism, and beauty. All great artists must have this form of neuroticism. Short neuroticism is pedantic, interpersonal, self-obsessed, and petty. It manifests as semantic debates and rumination on past mistakes, or fear of the future.
Exercise can help convert short neuroticism into long neuroticism. This is important for individuals, but also for civilizations.
Decision makers should not be petty or pedantic. They should be idealistic and heroic. Hence, exercise should be a basic requirement for our elite. Starting tomorrow, all elite universities should introduce elite physical requirements, such as pullups, pushups, and sprints.
If a disabled person wants to become a scientist, they should be able to do so at a regular university. But elite-tier universities should reserve their enrollment to elite-level athletes.7
CONCLUSION
Everyone who cares about me and what I have to say must become hardcore. There is no better place to start than in the domain of physical training.
I do not want to share this because it is embarrassing. I am not as skinny as I used to be, and my muscles have atrophied due to injuries. I don’t feel very good right now due to chronic sleep deprivation and stress.
However, my standard of success with this blog has always been: if a single person benefits, it is all worth it. No matter how imperfect it is, no matter how many mistakes I make, or how many people hate me and think I am mediocre, all the squeaky wheeled critiques in the comments section are irrelevant. The only thing that matters is the positive impact I make.
If I could go back to mentor myself as a young boy, the first change I would make would be to provide myself with instruction and partnership in physical training. One is never too young to do daily deadhangs, sprints, knee-pushups, and other calisthenic movements. The development of strong fascia and postural competence provide a solid foundation for adulthood.
Life is cumulative. The actions you take today impact your day tomorrow. This year lays the groundwork for next year. This decade determines the next decade. Everything that you do matters, and because of the exponential returns on cumulative action, you cannot afford to delay.
Krypogal wrote a post where she said to stop worrying about getting old. I agree: one shouldn’t worry; one should act. Worrying is the activity of someone who has no power or control. If you are worrying, that means you aren’t working enough. One who works continuously has nothing to worry about, because they are trying their best.
If your goal in life is to be happy and content, there is no point to trying your best or stressing yourself out. However, for the artist and the idealist, every pain can be justified in the pursuit of beauty and excellence.
The point of this blog is to help cultivate an American globalist elite to usher in neo-liberal ethnogenesis and a new species of man. Many are called, few will answer. All of my ideas are worthless if they do not find a suitable vessel. In fact, I am probably wrong about several things, and therefore, my ideas are only valuable insofar as they can be challenged and dynamically integrated.
Your capacity to understand, digest, and in some cases, refute or alter my ideas will increase if you, the reader, do your utmost to train your body. Without this foundation, you cannot become the elite I need you to become. Yes, I need you. If I cannot have children, then you, reader, are my only legacy.
If you do not conceive of yourself as that elite, you can still help him, as I seek to do. Your ability to assist is dependent on your energy, focus, and drive, all of which increase with physical training. We all have a duty and a part to play.
No one has any excuse to look worse than a guy with cancer. If you’re not already in a routine, get your ass in the gym today. Feel the pain, for my sake. We are on a quest. Make every day count.
If by gay, you mean “physically attracted to men,” I am gay. However, if by “homophobic,” you mean “afraid of homosexuals,” then I am also homophobic.
The soundtrack for this video is Lana Del Rey’s cover of “Country Roads.” I chose this song because I saw that Sebastian Jensen recommended it, and I fell asleep listening to it last night. It adds to the comedy of the video. It is a song about the cycle of death and rebirth — an old man saying goodbye to memories of life, returning home to the Platonic realm, where he will prepare for reincarnation.
Sebastian inspired this post by talking about his struggle with chronic pain, which I find admirable.
I did this first thing in the morning. If I did it with a pump after a heavy gym session, it probably would have looked slightly better.
I attribute my lack of success in relationships not to poverty, ugliness, or autism, but due to avoidant attachment. I get very scared of becoming dependent on a woman (I anticipate being humiliated when she leaves me), and preemptively sabotage the relationship. Perhaps the best way to fight this tendency is to prioritize duty to one’s family: love thy father and mother.
My ankle, knee, both shoulders, sacrum, and wrist are all dislocated, or at daily risk of repeated dislocation under stress. I had a failed labrum repair (they did not heal the bicep tendon), and a failed hernia repair. These problems keep getting worse, due to progressive hypermobility.
This means I cannot do squats, pushups, pullups, bicep curls, deadhangs, sprinting, or the stair climber.
However, I can do isometric exercises at low weights, such as assisted pullups, assisted deadhang, tricep pulldowns, and isometric quad holds.
Since all my joints are dislocated, I sometimes end up spending 20 hours a week in the gym doing low intensity cardio and stretching. This is more meditative than practical.
I would not qualify, but I wasn’t going to get in anyway.
