Weak Fatties vs Elijah Shaffer

Crisis Management Sex Wars Hotline

I have seen some fat and physically weak people attacking Elijah Shaffer. In this essay, I would like to explain why I find that disgusting, and why there is a special place in hell for those who neglect the beauty of the body.

Elijah Shaffer is a right-wing podcaster. He began posting erratic messages to Twitter, claiming things like “my family has been kidnapped by the FBI.” Given what we know now, there are two ways to interpret this:

• Elijah was genuinely experienced a drug induced psychosis where he was unwilling to accept that his wife left him

• Elijah was acting crazy on purpose so he could blame his behavior on drug addiction

Personally, I think it was the latter. Elijah is a grifter and lies with ease. If I was advising him, I would give him a 10/10 for his performance.

Here’s the thing:

An OrthoBro caught banging his fellow TradCath, cheating on both of their partners, is not going to get away with it. He is not going to hide it, or sweep it under the rug. The more he tries to hide it, the bigger the “Streisand Effect.” If he act scared, embarrassed, or try to lie, the more people will become curious and interested in your story.

If he really wants the pain to go away, he has to rip off the band-aid. Step one: attract everyone to your story by blowing it up as much as possible.

Claim to have killed your wife and children.

WOAH DEEP LEFT THAT’S FUCKING CRAZY.

Chill. Hear me out.

When Elijah first claimed that his wife and children went missing, everyone assumed the obvious: Elijah Schaffer killed his wife and children. That is a logical assumption, given the high-profile cases we have all heard where a man’s wife and children suddenly go “missing” and then later their bodies are discovered in a shallow grave.

The idea that Elijah killed his wife and kids is shocking, but unfortunately, everything he was saying and doing fit that pattern. “Uh, I don’t know where my wife and kids are! the FBI kidnapped them! I’m a hapless idiot!” Riiiiight. So he killed them, didn’t he?

But Schaffer was just pretending to be a family-killer, and he’s actually just a run-of-the-mill cheater. This kicks things down a notch.

Human psychology is funny. If you cheat on your wife, you’re a monster. But if people think you killed your wife, and then they come to find out you only cheated on her, well, what a relief! Not so bad after all!

I think I got pulled into this thinking with Epstein. Everyone says he killed babies and sacrificed them to Moloch; I discovered there was no evidence for this and he was being unfairly maligned… therefore, Epstein was a good guy!

Not so fast. If you told me there was a guy paying random 18 year olds for massages, jacking off in front of them, having sex with other men’s wives, shilling for Russia, working with Steve Bannon and Noam Chomsky, shilling for the Emiratis, I would not think that was a very good person. But because everyone has demonized Epstein so terribly, in comparison with that demonic figure, he comes out seeming relatively good.

One could even make a similar case for Hitler. If you think he was making lampshade and soap, and then you learn those were lies, you might feel obligated to give him the benefit of the doubt — maybe Hitler wasn’t such a bad guy after all.

This is a very effective tactic at blunting, redirecting, and reversing the impact of reputational damage. You start out with an outrage claim — Moloch, lampshades, wife-killing — and then you dial it down — jailbait, mass graves, cheating. All of a sudden, it doesn’t seem so bad.

The human mind is funny in this way, that it is unable to judge things objectively, and can only see morality in relative terms. Utilitarians don’t like this, but this seems highly functional to me. If we lived in feudal Europe, where they were bashing cat skulls with their foreheads, then it would not be functional to care a whole lot about animal cruelty. People who cannot see morality in relative terms are paralyzed by the absolute depravity of mankind, and they are unable to focus on addressing the lowest hanging fruit.

Moral relativism (I am using the term in a particular sense as defined above, don’t get pedantic with me) is a productive way of interacting with the world, because it allows us to prioritize greater evils over lesser ones, thereby expending our limited energy in the most effective way.

Obviously, if Elijah is not engaging in a ruse, and he actually had a drug-induced psychosis, then his subconscious has excellent instincts and is protecting him from himself. We call that “a natural.”

Anyway, yes, Elijah Shaffer did not kill his wife — he actually just cheated on his wife with Sarah Stock, who allegedly got pregnant by him and had an abortion.

Milo Yiannopolous gives the breakdown of his side of the story.

Milo and Laura Loomer always seem to have the dirt on these people. That tells me two things:

1. Right-wingers are very dirty people

2. Milo and Loomer are very good at digging

I don’t know how they do it, but they always have the scoop. I think the right-wing is just filled with dirty dogs, and they are all snitches, and no one can keep their mouths shut.

Maybe this isn’t particular to the right wing, but it is actually product of just political podcasters being cut-throat clout chasers. They tried to cancel Harry Sisson for asking women for nudes.

Sex Wars

I try to put out at least one embarrassing article about myself on a monthly basis, and I spend half my time defending P Diddy and Jeffrey Epstein, so if anyone finds out that I’ve been secretly hitting up the “Women of the Deep Left” no one should be surprised.

I suppose I’m at an advantage here because I’ve picked a very niche political sub-culture of my own creation which is filled with deeply closeted homosexuals, so I just don’t have that many attitudes to be perverted. If there ever is a Deep Left sex scandal I hope it looks something like this: